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Joke of the Day

"Instead of going to Starbucks, I make my own coffee, yell my name out incorrectly, and then light a $5 bill on fire."

"If it weren't for marriage, women would have to spend most of their adult lives arguing with complete strangers."

"A man walks in for a blood donation. The nurse asks ""Are you sexually active?"" The man replies ""Wouldn't that be rather awkward with us both sitting here?"""

"What's 8 inches long, rock hard and full of sperm The sock under my bed"

"I'll drink responsibly when there is a brand of vodka named Responsibly"

"psychology joke How many psycho analyists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, provided the light bulb is ready to change."

"What's the most racist fraction? 3/5"

"What do you get when you go to a concert in Paris? Shot."

"What do you call a Greek intellectual that only eats kimchee? An Epikorean."

"Her: Wasn't it fun cutting down our own Christmas tree? Me: Yea, especially when that guy chased us out of his yard..."