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Joke of the Day

"If it weren't for marriage, women would have to spend most of their adult lives arguing with complete strangers."

"A boss at a workplace says to his secretary, ""File this report, please.""""You file it, sir,"" the secretary replies. ""I'm a secretary, not a woodworker."""

"How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? Rename the mail folder ""Instruction Manuals."""

"Matthew McConaughey for president 2016: Make America Alright Alright Alright Again!"

"You don't have to like me but at least base it on your own opinion, not someone Else's."

"An atheist, a crossfitter, a vegan and a vaper all walk into a bar I know because they all let me know 12 times in our 3 minute conversation"

"A woman asked her husband ""what trait of me do you love the most?'' ''My beautiful face? My sexy body?"" The husband looked at her from top to bottom, and answered, ""I love your humor."""

"Whose the most vague person in the Military ? General Direction."

"Starting to think these Herman Cain commemorative coins were a bad investment."

"As I approach 50, my wife suggested I get myself one of those high performance penis enlargers... So I have. She's 25 and her name is Candy."