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Joke of the Day

"""If you have a ministry like Jesus it will probably be made up of about 12 people who don't get your illustrations, & 1 wants to kill you."""

Next Joke
 
"Man goes to a restaurant Sits down at a table by himself and places a calender in front of him. The waiter ask why the calendar? Man replies ""I didn't want to be alone so I brought some dates"""
"Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad? A: Senator."
"My parents are divorced. I feel fat and all the other girls my age have boyfriends. Him: Being a teenager is tough. Me: *sigh* I'm 40."
"If zombies attack I'm heading south, most of those people don't have teeth."
"I just want to be wealthy enough to fill a swimming pool with puppies. A lot of puppies are going to die but I think it will be worth it"
"Jurisprudence fetishist gets off on appeal"
"Chuck Norris blood type is.. AK-47"
"What is a Redneck virgin? A 7-year-old that can run faster than her brothers!"
"If you knew what I considered to be my ""best behavior"" it's doubtful you'd advise me to be ""on it""."