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Joke of the Day
"My facial hair is Italian and native American It's Apache"
Next Joke
"When the grammar nazi learned his friend had less than 6 months to live. *fewer"
"Bon Iver just walked into my Starbucks. Wait nope just a super sad cat."
"comic sans divorce papers"
"I decided I am going to be a virgin... so that I can set a good example for my children"
"Made the mistake of ordering chlorine for the pool and researching Kenya so I'm tweeting this from what appears to be a windowed black van."
"What do you get when you combine a pun and a rhetorical question?"
"Why do black people have white palms? Everyone has a little good in them."
"People say that it's unethical to eat meat But I feel good every time I eat bacon and remember that I've taken a pig that was living a squalid and miserable life and sent it to heaven."
"My friend called me a pussy the other day. I told him ""You know what the say, you are what you eat."" Ayyyy"