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Joke of the Day

"Baltimore CVS Looters They really cleaned the place out. The only things they left behind are sunscreen and Father's Day cards."

"My friend attempted to make a cocktail... but she didn't have the Bols."

"We had to put my horse down. After he escaped from the barn, the veterinarian said he was too unstable."

"My grandfather died during the Holocaust. Fell right out of the guard tower."

"What idiot decided to call it chewing tobacco instead of chewbacca?"

"How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and one to give it a surprising twist at the end."

"What's a black mans' least favourite ice cream van? Mr Whippy."

"Me: Table for four, please. And can we get some crayons? Her: Will there be children dining today? Me: No. The crayons are for me."

"Recently asked my North Korean buddy how it was over there... He said he couldn't complain."

"Why was epsilon afraid of zeta? Because zeta ate a theta"