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Joke of the Day

"When my wife is sleeping I open her handbag, take out my balls, pat them & whisper ""I know guys I miss you too"" then put them back quietly."

"Will I live to see 90? You just did."

"nurse: ""if youre going to give grapes to a baby make sure you cut them in half"" me: [visibly confused] wife: ""the grapes keith not the baby"""

"Why did the Seahawks win the 2015 NFC Championship game against the Packers? Because even Aaron Rodgers is a 12!"

"Resolva qualquer problema. E simples... escreva qual o problema e clique em resolver http://www.splitz.com.br/problem http://www.splitz.com.br/problem"

"a seal walks into a club eh"

"Lord of the Rings is symbolic of Marriage One ring rules your life, it slowly destroys you, and sometimes, death seems easier than continuing on."

"Why did Jesus leave the dance floor? Because it was Hammertime'"

"Billy asked our Astronomy teacher a simple question today... ""Mrs. North? How big is Uranus?"" Billy was sent to the office..."

"A blind guy walks into a bar... And into a table.. and a chair..."