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Joke of the Day

"Married men aren't allowed to go the grocery store alone because we're the kid in the shopping cart, but with money"

"Native Americans are all pissed that we took their land when they were here first... ..but we made reservations."

"You know you're getting old when ... the doctor tells you to slow down and the cops tell you to speed up."

"Robin Hood went to see a doctor... ...he was diagnosed with Menintightis."

"What color does your skin turn when you pour molten gold onto it? Au-burn ^He^^He^^^He^^^^He"

"What do Bristol Palin and Iraq have in common? It's just so hard to pull out."

"Confidence A driverless car company announced that they will not sell their product to people who have less than five years' driving experience."

"Cheap date idea: cut open a pack of hotdogs & squeeze the juice over your lover's body then summon a peregrine falcon with your mind."

"I got a free wallet and watch today. It's like this gun is magic."

"TWILIGHT: Taking the N' out of ""Vampire Fangs"", since 2007!"