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Joke of the Day

"Scientists thought we would never have enough air to survive on the moon... ...then they opened a bag of Lays chips."

"Sometimes I can't tell if I'm looking at a captcha or a text from my mom."

"Why Did the Native Americans Car Break Down? Their Injun died on them!"

"Crowds hated it but the best weapon for fighting a lion in the gladiator ring was a spray bottle and a firm ""NO."""

"[raises hand in English class] Why do we need to be learned English? ""Hmm.. Couldn't have worded that better myself, Luke"""

"I'm going to a Pearl Harbor Day party later on. I'm totally going to get bombed! *Now... give me your downvotes... yes, I feed upon your scorn!*"

"tried to drown my sorrows, but after three days, mother-in-law floated back to the shore."

"What's a pedophile's favorite wing in a children's hospital? ICU"

"My boobs are so big you can't even motorboat me. You have to row boat me. With oars."

"Why did Jared go to a Goat farm? He heard there was lots of Kids there."