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Joke of the Day

"What's a pedophile's favorite wing in a children's hospital? ICU"

"I saw a midget in a KKK outfit today I think he is a little racist."

"GIRL NEARBY: I'm breaking up with you, Kevin. You don't talk about Pokemon enough. [I sit up straight and frantically try smoothing my hair]"

"Liquids with high viscosity... Why can't liquids with high viscosity get insurance? They resist Flo."

"So a black guy walks into a bank... Approaching the nearest available teller, he says, ""Hi, I'd like to file for bankruptcy."" ""Okay"", the teller replies, ""what's your name?"" ""Fifty Cent"" badum tisss"

"Did I ever tell you about the time I had a fart that lasted for an entire minute? It's a long-winded story."

"""do you know why I pulled one over on you?"" becau- wait what? ""I'm not a real cop lol"" haha nice! *pulls gun* ""I am taking your car though"""

"I looked at the calendar and thought, ""It's been one of those days today."""

"I had to use a rotary phone to try to get concert tickets so don't you tell me Ticket Master online is taking too long"

"What sort of net is useless for catching fish ? A football net !"