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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard of the newest study? Experts say that 82% of people believe what is said in make-believe studies when they claim that they are confirmed by experts."

"How do blind people know when they're done wiping?"

"Never sky dived before, but I just zoomed google maps way too fast. Pure adrenaline."

"I'm like Harvard. Hard to get into, but once you're in, everyone is super impressed."

"If you steal my tweets I'll just unfollow you cuz your tweets are terrible."

"On our way to husbands vasectomy he asks *do you think they'll want me to remove my socks?*. I don't know what he thinks is about to happen."

"Accepting a Facebook friend request from someone you follow on twitter is like bringing home your drug dealer to meet your family."

"What do you call a white guy who grew up in the ghetto? Tarzan."

"2 Rules to Be Successful 1) Don't tell everyone everything you know. 2)"

"Boy, Peter Parker is lucky he was bitten by a spider and not one of those fainting goats."