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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an oyster shucker with epilepsy and a prostitute with diarrhea? One shucks between fits and the other fucks between shits."

"Why did the console gamer cross the road? To render the other side."

"What do you call two guys with no arms or legs hanging from a window? Curt and Rod"

"I went to the zoo today. All they had was one dog. It was a shit zoo"

"What's the worst part of being a cook in prison? Having to toss everyone's salad"

"Why did the burgler take a bath? He wanted to have a 'clean getaway'."

"Whats the best thing Orlando Bloom's ever been in? Katy Perry"

"Me: are you serious? GF: yes I can't take it anymore, you're too unpredictable Me: [wearing a different shirt] what are you talking about?"

"Jokes about abusive parents... ...just hit too close to home."

"Being politically correct sucks. I can't even say ""black paint"" anymore. Now I have to say, ""hey Jamal would you please go paint that fence over there?"""