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Joke of the Day

"I like my coffee like my slaves Free"

"So evidently the kid who stabbed all the people at his highschool today was always told he would be famous. He felt like today was the day to take a stab at it."

"look son, i kinda need you to go to hong kong & win a martial arts tournament to the death for me because i sorta told my neighbor you did"

"How do you make cultured milk? You take it to the Moo-seum. I know this joke is terrible, but I totally came up with it on my own, but I'm sure it exists already."

"Smoke a joint before hitting a buffet to really get your money's worth... Just saying."

"People say you are what you eat... So you're a dick."

"Postmodernism pun Hi all, I'm trying to come up with a clever pun on postmodernism but I'm stumped. Does anyone have any clever puns on postmodernism?"

"A priest, a rabbi and a gorilla walk into a bar. The bartender looks over and says ""Is this some kind of joke?"""

"You know, I really didn't like my new haircut... But then it grew on me."

"I saw a bald eagle take a shit mid-flight today. I've never been prouder to be an American."