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Joke of the Day

"So evidently the kid who stabbed all the people at his highschool today was always told he would be famous. He felt like today was the day to take a stab at it."

"Why did Kanye West blow up the bakery? Because no one man should have all that flour."

"Where do elephants keep their reproductive organs? On their feet because when they step on you, you're fucked."

"When you wish upon a star Makes no difference who you are It's a ball of gas and fire It can't hear you."

"What's Bruce Lee's favourite drink? WAAAAAATEEEEERRRR"

"*pulls away from kissing, stares intently into his eyes Your eyes are like pools of melted chocolate Him: U started your diet, didn't u"

"What's a Pirates favorite letter? You would think its R, but but it's really the C!"

"If you ever come across a bear in the wild, throw a tiny bicycle at him. Then, just let his circus instincts take care of the rest."

"I can make you speak even MORE Irish. Say this five times fast: ""Your fork can eat jet."""

"I have but two words to describe Avogadro's Number Holy moley!"