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Joke of the Day

"Judge: You stand before me accused of being a duvet. How do you plead? Defendant: Not quilty."

"What country can't be hacked? Madagascar, because all their ports are closed."

"I hate when my son does something wrong & he puts the blame back on me for not wearing a condom 10 years ago. Who can argue with that logic?"

"I'd like to tell you a joke about paper... but it's tearable."

"I hate when I catch a bouquet at a wedding and everyone judges me for lighting it on fire."

"I went shopping . . . I went to the supermarket to get some groceries. When I got to the dairy section, they only had one piece of cheese left. It was provolone."

"I'm experiencing heavy call volumes. Please hang up and never call me again."

"I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape. I should get a new keyboard."

"Whats the hardest part eating a vegetable? The wheelchair"

"Sex makes my day But anal makes my hole weak"