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Joke of the Day

"Taking a nap now. If you're tempted to wake me, please remember Jurassic Park. Just because we can do it, doesn't always mean we should."

"If your phone gets wet, try placing it in a bag of rice... ... at night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you."

"If you're out and you see a donkey, say ""hey, come here donkey."" He might not come but if he does, free donkey"

"Members of my family suffer from a medical condition called ""death,"" but it only strikes late in life."

"Why are pedophiles so full of themselves? They only have sex with people who look up to them."

"Knock knock Who's there? Police. Your wife has been involved in a terrible car accident."

"Where could you look up Joan of Arc's profile? On Tinder."

"I stopped writing poetry when I realized their only value was to threaten to read them to people if they didn't do what I wanted."

"The US asked Mexico how many illegal immigrants got into America each year... Mexico said- ""Not Juan"""

"What was the name of the Indian dating site? Connect the dots"