220204

Joke of the Day

"What do we want? An end to auto-correct errors! When do we want it? Cow! Sow! Bow! Tow! Duck this..."

"My fiance is a med student and was talking to me about her geriatrics class... ... and my first thought was ""This is getting old real fast."""

"Why shouldn't you wear loose fitting shorts when visiting Ukraine? Because Chernobyl fallout"

"Told my 4 yo that his hamster died and that was in heaven with God. 4yo: Why would God want a dead hamster?"

"A man is buying a banana, an apple and two eggs. The female cashier says: ""You must be single."" The man answers: ""Wow, how did you know?"" Cashier: ""Because you're ugly."""

"I think three movies is a bit much for the hobbit. Seems like they're really dragon it out."

"Q: What do you call a video of pedestrians? A: Footage."

"How many Dependent P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb? None he's still clinging to the old lightbulb."

"Two silkworms had a race... I heard they ended in a tie."

"Helping a few people complete their bucket list so they will just die already."