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Joke of the Day

"A man is buying a banana, an apple and two eggs. The female cashier says: ""You must be single."" The man answers: ""Wow, how did you know?"" Cashier: ""Because you're ugly."""

"MAGICIAN: Think of a number, any number. ME: *thinks for a bit* ...k MAGICIAN: That is a letter. ME: omg ur right"

"Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses?.....That's as crazy as the low low prices at Dave's Furniture Emporium"

"My 4-year-old sang in church for the first time. So what if it was the wrong song? There's never a bad time for ""We Will Rock You."""

"The only thing worse than sitting down on a cold toilet seat is sitting down on a warm toilet seat."

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. That's a man's job."

"Sometimes I sit on my hand till it's numb so it feels like someone else is googling my name"

"Why did the hoover not make the football team? Because he sucked With love and sexy things from Jaques x"

"What do you get when you order a JFK? An americano with an extra shot"

"Name a famous explorer ""Name a famous explorer that has been forgotten"", asked my son ""Internet explorer."", I replied."