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Joke of the Day

"*wearing an apron and oven mitts* This is an old family recipe *I take a bag of M&Ms out of the freezer*"

Next Joke
 
"What is a Barefooted Locksmith's favorite drink? Sake. (sock-key)"
"CLICKBAIT TITLE (*bad pun goes here*) (*necessary edit acknowledging upvotes and more bad puns in comments*) (*necessary second edit for the anon's gold*)"
"My mom likes to get to the airport three days before her flight."
"The only b word you should call a woman is beautiful. B!tches love to be called beautiful."
"I'm friends with 25 letters of the alphabet.... But I don't know Y"
"I want to name my next pet Peeve."
"It's a good thing this video game is rated mature because it's going to be babysitting the kids tonight."
"First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering"
"Don't you just hate it when ... You can't understand what your girl is trying to say? Take a step back and what's she's trying to say will become a lot clearer"