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Joke of the Day

"The light at the end of the tunnel are the front lights of a train."

"Still waiting for the FedEx joke? OP didn't deliver."

"What do you get when you mix a black man with microwave chicken? (May be offensive) Mike Tyson"

"I'm thinking of starting a youth foundation... I mean I've already got like 30 kids buried in my basement."

"Your Momma is so stupid she put sand paper on the bottom of her wheelchair, talk'n bout she a ruff rider."

"Hate being fat. Love eating food."

"Women can't seem to resist my charms. What? They're magically delicious."

"*calls boss* Me: I can't come to work. Boss: Why not? Me: Gotham city needs me. Boss: ...You're not Batman. Me: Oh, yes, yes, exaaaactly."

"i went into the bar and ordered a Whiskey Osama... the batender asked ""what's that?"" i answered ""Two shots and a splash of water."""

"Knew a guy who fashioned an entire suit out of rubber bands. He was quite the snappy dresser."