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Joke of the Day
"What do you call mints you can spread through social media? Memementos"
Next Joke
"Wife was in ICU Doctor: She is in a coma. Husband: Please save her. She's just 30. *Just then, ECG starts beeping. Fingers move. Her lips mumbled... And she spoke: I'm 29"
"*Goes to Czechoslovakia to shop for a car with Automatic Braking System *Czechs for ABS"
"What is the Mexicans favorite credit card company? Capital Juan"
"What do you call a can after it completes college? A graduated cylinder."
"4: I'M GONNA RIP YOUR EYEBALLS OUT Me: Stop yelling violent things 4: *whispers* I'm gonna rip your eyeballs out"
"What I reply with when someone asks, ""What'd the comment say?"" [Removed]"
"WIFE: would you chop these onions for me ME: sure WIFE: I meant with a knife ME (tightening the belt on my karate robe): aww man"
"what's that word for when you're peeling off a sticker & it comes off in 1 perfect strip & it's better than love or joy or any human emotion"
"I heard Jewish girls like 8 inches... less 10%."