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Joke of the Day

"I was walking along a narrow cliff top when... a gorgeous woman was coming from the opposite direction. I didn't know whether to block her passage or toss myself off."

"I was thinking about where Luke Skywalker goes to buy his change of clothes while talking to my girlfriend. Me: I wonder where Luke Skywalker buys his clothes. Her: The Darth Maul. ;) I love my life."

"Did you hear about the worlds greatest magician? He was walking down the street and turned into a drug store"

"What do you call a kangaroo who chases rock stars to have sex with them? A kangaroupie."

"my shower thoughts kept getting deeper and deeper and deeper... then i realized it was because i had the drain-plug in."

"If you think politicians are the best at 'spin'... you should listen more at funerals."

"""shaved carrots instead of cheese"" lol okay Vogue thanks for the diet advice those totally taste the same"

"Growing up is when you go from using drugs for fun to using drugs for survival."

"Girls aren't hard to understand They don't have dicks."

"A swastika has been spray painted over Donald Trump's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame... ...Police say it's impossible to tell if the act was committed by Trump's opponents or supporters."