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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new in-flight corduroy pillows? They're making headlines everywhere"

"When I listen to Nirvana I want to blow my head off with the nearest shotgun."

"A child is being pushed around in a pink toy convertible while eating a chocolate frosted donut, and I want to ask her how she got this job."

"My sister was in love with a Mexican guy. She wanted him to marry her but he went home to Mexico... ... I guess he's the Juan that got away."

"Where do Old Egyptian people go to Swim? The Senile River"

"German restaurant joke.... I went to a German restaurant and ordered an omelette....I just got a plate with two dots on it....."

"What's the difference between soap and SOPA? You won't get fucked if you drop SOPA."

"Salesman: That suit looks nice. It fits like a bandage. Customer: Thanks. I bought it by accident."

"The Cleveland Browns completely revamped their playbook Every pass play now has a 12 step drop back..."

"*takes long drag from cigarette* *stares off into the distance* *slowly glances down at hand* *lights cigarette*"