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Joke of the Day
"Where do farm animals get their groceries? The pharmacy."
Next Joke
"Next week I have an MRI scheduled to find out whether or not I have claustrophobia."
"I've just invented a new word. plagiarism"
"When I was 6 I got coal from Santa... The next year I decided to get back at him and poison the cookies. Somehow, the bastard found out and killed my dad"
"You only live once, so don't forget to spend 16 hours every day on the internet, desperately searching for the validation of strangers."
"I saw a Chinese baby and a black kid wave at each other this morning. Gives me hope for the future. Or at least another Rush Hour movie"
"I don't know why they call it the Oedipus Complex. Banging your mom seems fairly simple."
"A woodworm walks into a bar... and says, is the bar tender? ba dum tsss"
"A man is standing on the top of a tall building about to commit suicide... ...when a physicist at the bottom shouts up, ""Don't do it! You have so much potential!"""
"Yesterday one of my patients told me about the time he sat on his testicles... It was nuts."