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Joke of the Day

"I wonder who the Jonses try to keep up with."

"I told my wife she should call me a champion bullrider... Because I consistently last 8 seconds riding a horned animal."

"What did the mom say when she found out her son took an unexpected trip north? I don't like your latitude!"

"Slightly over half of marriages end in divorce... ... the rest are fatal."

"I love it when corporations have a sassy ""human"" Twitter presence, like their CEO wouldn't cut your mom's throat for a nickel."

"A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic horses up his ass. The doctor described his condition as stable."

"My eyes are brown with tiny flecks of narcissism."

"What does a dog have in common with a near-sighted gynecologist? They both have wet noses."

"The girl that just walked by gave my dog a double take like she thought she might've gone to high school with him."

"A joke about mods [deleted]"