219307

Joke of the Day

"You girls are so cute, talking about crumbs in your bra. I found a missing hiker in mine."

"If my girlfriend caught me telling a sexist joke, she'd get really... emotional"

"Why are artificial eyes made from glass? They gotta be see-through"

"If I ever have a son, I'm going to name him Sparta, that way I can introduce him as ""This is SPARTA!!!"""

"Two guys talking ""Tell me , have you ever been awakened by a blowjob?"" ""No ,i always sleep with my mouth shut."""

"I showed up to run a marathon, but realized that I had forgotten my water bottle. I decided to run anyway... ... I finished in 3^st"

"Is it just my nipples or is it cold outside. They're hard as rock. EDIT: They're"

"What do Harry Potter and Kermit the Frog's penis have in common? Hogwarts."

"What do you call a broken lizard? Ereptile dysfunction"

"Twitter is an invention created by aliens so we don't notice the period of time missing when they take us for experimentation."