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Joke of the Day

"Passed a sign that says, ""All you can eat, $30/person"" but I don't think I can eat $30 worth of people."

"What is the hardest part of watching an orphanage burn down? My dick."

"What do you call someone who went into a birth clinic and started shooting at everyone there? Spawn camper."

"Now that I have an adult coloring book, most arguments with my 3 yr old are over fridge space."

"Perfect Joke: Two peanuts were walking down the street... ...one was assaulted."

"Threesomes I never understood the obsession with threesomes , if I wanted to disappoint two people at once I would have lunch with my parents."

"This venomous snake is pretty scary. What can we do to make it even scarier? Put a toy for babies on its tail. YES"

"Why do Mexicans make tamales for Christmas? To have something to unwrap."

"when you push a pull door and the person behind says ""you need to pull"" aye cheers lad sure next plan was to start lifting from the bottom"

"First boy: My dad saw a horrible witch and didn't turn a hair! Second boy: I'm not surprised - your dad's bald!"