21891

Joke of the Day

"just so you know the guacamole costs an extra $1.80 plus one of your arms and the soul of your first born child thanks for choosing chipotle"

Next Joke
 
"Me and my Pink Floyd cover band played at an Epilepsy Awareness Concert... ... we absolutely killed!"
"Why Did 9Gag Cross The Road? To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side."
"WIFE: this year, can you put the santa presents out for the kids christmas morning? GUY WHO NEVER FOUND OUT SANTA CLAUS ISN'T REAL: what"
"Q: What do you call a snake that rides around on the front of a car? A: A windshield viper."
"It's my epileptic friend's birthday soon so I got him a strobe light. He's going to have a fucking fit when he sees it."
"Of course every kiss begins with k. That's how the English language works, stupid."
"I feel sorry for men who don't know how to value women. One look at a woman and I KNOW how much she will cost me."
"Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes."
"I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner... ...all it was doing was gathering dust."