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Joke of the Day

"Mexicans are shocked about Trump's wall But they'll get over it"

"""So, doctor, do I have cancer or not?"" ""Oh Jesus Christ, holy shit, tons of it,"" said the doctor to Martin Shkreli."

"What is Pi squared? Pop-tart."

"Why was the broom late? It overswept. *BadJokesBestJokes.*"

"Cute Internet Girl: This guy is pretty funny, I think I'll fol- Me: *Human Cannonballs my way into her living room* HELLO!"

"What's the difference between acetone and Hitler? One is used to remove the polish, and the other is used to remove the Polish."

"My father was a nun. Whenever he was up in court and the judge asked ""occupation"", he'd say ""none"". (From Blackadder Goes Forth, is this still eligible for /r/jokes?)"

"Sex is like Math. Add a bed, Subtract the clothes, Divide the legs, and pray you don't Multiply!"

"What did the pirate with the steering wheel in his pants say? ""Argh it's driving me nuts!"""

"- I like to travel in first - But is expensive, is not? - Yes, I have already broken three cars!! European joke..."