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Joke of the Day
"So I entered a race where we had to sprint the length of a 12 inch ruler It was a foot race"
Next Joke
"I was going to post a Michael Brown joke.. ..but I'm afraid it would just get shot down."
"[posing for mugshot] ""now turn forward"" [flash] lemme see"
"I bet if you walked up to any table at a restaurant and said ""Good afternoon folks"" they will let you take their order."
"Pauly D from Jersey Shore was at the Dance party where Chuck Norris invented the Electric Slide. His hair is now permanently stuck in a blowout position."
"*tweets about new invisibility cloak invention* *forgets where he left it*"
"Have you watched the documentary about sponges? It's absorbing."
"Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because the B shells are too small and the D shells are too big!"
"What do you call alternative medicine that works? Medicine."
"Rihanna just started dating Chris Brown He struck her as a violent person"