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Joke of the Day

"Dad joke Dad: [Grabs chest] Quick! call me an ambulance! Son: You're... an ambulance. Dad: I'm-I'm so proud of you, son. [Dies]"

"Latest Apple news: Tablet rumours a hoax. Apple to unveil new iPhone with rotary dial in plan to dominate senior demographic."

"Did you hear about the guy who invented a knife that can cut four loaves of bread at once? He's calling it the ""Four Loaf Cleaver."""

"The lord said unto John, ""Come forth and receive eternal life,"" but john came fifth and won a toaster."

"What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust"

"What does Damn Daniel and pedophiles have in common? They're both back at it with the white vans."

"Old Stupid Joke http://www.digg.com"

"If you piss me off bad enough and tell me to leave you alone, I will take 30 Adderall and send you cat pictures every 3 minutes for 6 days."

"What does an elephant use for a tampon? A sheep"

"Love your friends, crop dust your enemies in a crowded elevator."