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Joke of the Day

"What's the same between Brussel sprouts and anal sex? If you enjoy it as as an adult you hated it as a kid"

"If you're smoking weed on the way to Home Depot I can predict your future, in 2 hrs you're going back to Home Depot."

"Did you hear about the pedophile musician? He was caught fingering A-minor."

"Why is a Mexican midget called a paragraph? Because he isn't a full ese."

"Q: How can you tell a blonde is being unfaithful? A: Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin."

"What does smoking a cigarette and eating a pussy have in common? [NSFW] The flavor gets stronger as you get closer to the butt."

"I'm a senior in college with 2 semesters left, and I'm considering picking up a minor Do I lie about my age, or do I just offer to buy her cigarettes and booze?"

"Making the arrangements for my wife's funeral is tough. She keeps asking what I'm doing"

"Blood is thicker than water. But maple syrup is thicker than blood. So pancakes are more important than family. I said it."

"Made a graph of my past relationships I have an ex-axis and a why-axis"