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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Helen Keller and a redneck Helen Keller got famous for not being able to read"

"I fell in the mud. And took a shower right after!"

"I liked The Hobbit books, but Harry Potter? That's a different story..."

"What has 2000 eyes and 4000 feet? A thousand dogs."

"Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: who just threw that? Boy: Me! I'm going home now."

"All cicadas must be female because they never shut the fuck up."

"Why do girls suck at playing hockey as goalie? Because there are 3 periods and only 2 pads"

"Never play musical chairs against a person in a wheelchair. They will always beat you."

"Imagine if your fridge did what you do to it everyday- Every half hour it goes to your room opens the door, and stares at you for 5 minutes then leaves."

"What's the difference between pink and purple? The grip."