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Joke of the Day

"GUY: Your logic is flawed. According to experts- ME: Excuse me, but I practiced this argument in my head & you're saying the wrong things"

"Just came into a HUGH sum of money... I'm an ant and its a penny."

"How to be a white girl: 1.) Get a frappuccino from Starbucks 2.) take a picture drinking it 3.) Instagram it 4.) hash tag 'summerrrrrrrrr'"

"Two antennas get married... The ceremony was ok, But the reception was great!"

"R.I.P boiled water. . . You will be mist."

"""I got you, babe."" - kidnappers"

"What is the most prudent thing to do when someone is having an epileptic seizure in a hot tub? Throw in your laundry."

"Will Smith: ""Jaden, I want you to star in this 100 million dollar movie with me"" My Dad: ""Shut up and hold this flashlight Steve"""

"My friend is afraid of fruit. So I told him to grow a pear."

"Ever hear about that guy who sued the door factory? It was an open and shut case."