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Joke of the Day

"""I got you, babe."" - kidnappers"

"What is an Italian mobster's favorite cooking oil? Cannoli Oil."

"You know why ancient Greek children were always getting lost from their parents? 'Cause they kept Roman around!"

"What does Ukraine have in common with the iPhone 7? They both suffered the loss of one very important port."

"""No no no!"" said the enraged businessman to the persistent salesman. ""I cannot see you today!"" ""That's fine"" said the salesman ""I'm selling spectacles."""

"""Oh my god, I've...I've never seen anything like this before. This is incredible"" - me looking at a boob"

"What happens when a plant is sad? The other plants have to photosympathize with it"

"What do you call a abortion in Czechoslovakia? A cancelled check."

"Why are you stuffing all that Easter candy into your mouth?"" ""Because it doesn't taste as good if I stuff it in my ears."""

"Hey guys, I think I just got murdered but I'm not sure, and WebMD is like ZERO help."