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Joke of the Day
"""I got you, babe."" - kidnappers"
Next Joke
"Whichever part of my body is responsible for burning fat needs to stop procrastinating."
"Which real-life dictator was the most fun? Napoleon BonaPARTAY!!!"
"I have a habit... I have a habit of flipping around letters in a word. You say pencil, I say cenpil. You say banana, I say nababa. You say popcorn, I shut up."
"Fun Fact: I love it when Americans whose Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Grandfather emigrated from Ireland say ""I'm Irish"". No."
"Girlfriend The other day, my girlfriend called me a pedophile... But what does she know, she's only 7."
"People who comment with 'goose bums' on YouTube videos, more power to you!"
"How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, no light bulb dare go out in the presence of Chuck Norris."
"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my cock down your throat!"
"I bought a 32ft ruler. For extreme measures."