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Joke of the Day

"You've really gotta hand it to short people because we usually can't reach it anyway"

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"How does Donald Trump keep a handle on integral equations? He grabs them by the +c."
"How many Missouri Police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just shoot the room for being black."
"What is a horny pirate's worst nightmare? A sunken chest with no booty."
"I like my women how I like my whiskey....... Age 12 and all mixed up in coke."
"The problem with feminists... The problem with feminists is that they don't stop talking and I just want to fuck them."
"[Testing Cat-Human Translator] Scientist: Cat, what is your name? Cat: I AM KANG THE DESTROYER Owner: It's not working. His name is Socks."
"My jokes are like onions... They're layered. And because if you dissect them I'll cry."
"Have you heard about the condition that causes your penis to ejaculate when submerged in water? It comes in waves."
"How many jugglers does it take to change a light bulb? One, but it takes at least three light bulbs."