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Joke of the Day

"Can't believe Nintendo didn't make a commercial for the Wii where a guy breaks up with a girl by saying ""It's not you, It's Wii""."

"Did you know when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown but only 4 to extend your arm and punch them in the face."

"Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?"

"I heard Anheuser Busch is sending 9 truckloads of canned water to the areas affected by Hurricane Matthew. Who knew there was such a demand for Bud Light after a disaster?"

"Dark jokes Saturday: What is the most offensive brand name you can come up with? Winners get gold! My contribution: ""Auschwitz"" air freshener."

"Boss sent me a message the other day: *Send me some funny messages* I replied: *I'm working right now, I will send you later* Boss: *hahaha..send me another one*"

"You're Twitter famous. Cool, cool. I won a dodgeball tournament in 3rd grade and I got a real trophy for that."

"Why were there coffe beans at the subway station? Because they were under-ground."

"Libraries are a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn't be allowed to talk."

"So I went to an orgy at a campsite last night.... It was fucking intense."