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Joke of the Day

"A Programmer goes to the store to buy groceries... .... and while he's there, his wife calls and says: ""While you're out, get some eggs."" He never returns."

"The difference between the Pope and your boss. The Pope only expects you to kiss his ring. "

"Nestle has taken to putting ""Do not consume raw cookie dough"" on all of it's cookie packages Oh, Nestle You don't know me at all, do you?"

"Me: ..and a small sprite. McDonald's Girl: Want a large? All sizes are only $.99 Me: I ASKED FOR SMALL YOU DIABETES PEDDLER ok gimme a large"

"What's the best about dead childrens jokes? They never get old."

"A priest and a rabbi walk into congress Te priest turns to his friend and says ""is this some kind of joke?"""

"I ordered the CliffsNotes version of Snooki's book and they sent me a bar menu, a printout of the urban dictionary and an STD pamphlet."

"I went to the doctor for a chest cold, she looked at me and asked if I'd ever taken steroids. I said, ""No. but I appreciate the compliment."""

"Wow, this article looks awesome.*clicks link**finds out it's a slideshow**throws computer out the window*"

"What is the difference between acne and a priest? Acne waits until the boy is 14 to come on his face"