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Joke of the Day
"Hallucination An optical delusion."
Next Joke
"I treat my body like a temple. By that I mean that a bunch of Jewish guys enter me every Friday night."
"Becky on Facebook is having a bad hair day and wonders if anything will ever go right. Be strong Becky, be strong. Also shut up."
"""ARGHH A HOUSE SPIDER"" [spider removes earbuds] ""yah actually im more into ambient trance but whatever"""
"The industrious prostitute Well there was this prostitute who had a vagina surgically implanted in her hip...so she could make some money on the side."
"I was going to organize a space-themed birthday party for my son... ...but I couldn't planet."
"You find it offensive?... I find it funny.... That's why I'm happier than you"
"People claim they're into recycling, but just watch their faces when you rinse out a condom."
"My kids will be friends with people of all colors of the rainbow. That means no black people. (Credit goes to a person on either America's Got Talent or Britain's Got Talent, can't remember which)"
"Please, Lady, come home with me. You never know what I'll turn into, at midnight!"