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Joke of the Day

"If you try to rob my house, you should know that the item in the house I paid the most for are my son's braces."

"How many animals can you fit into a pair of panty hose? 2 calves, an ass, a beaver, a shitload of hares, 1 camel toe and a fish nobody can find."

"The Energizer Bunny got arrested the other day... He was charged with battery"

"My dating life"

"two ants are fighting on a toilet seat One of them gets pissed off."

"5yo: I can't wear those socks today. They say Wednesday. Me: If anyone notices, tell them you're here from the future to save the world."

"what do you call a 9 year old african boy crying on his knees Midlife crisis"

"Why did the whale cross the road ? To get to the other tide !"

"What was 2016? The best joke I've ever heard!"

"Dad joke- Car sick. I was riding in the car with my cousin and uncle. My cousin says ""I think i'm getting car sick"". Her dad says, ""Well if you get out of the car then you'll just be sick""."