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Joke of the Day

"I'm taking a stand. If the stand owners come looking for it, you guys saw nothing."

"Does the world really need another rhetorical question?"

"I drink Rockstar cause I'm a rockstar. My wife drinks Monster."

"A guy sees a blonde across a lake He shouts to her ""Hey how'd you get on the other side of the lake?"" she replies ""You're on the other side of the lake!"""

"I'm gonna name my firstborn ""arial"" and people will be like ""oh like the mermaid"" and i'll say ""no like the font"""

"Why do sheep love Star Wars Episode V? Because Dey-go-bah."

"evrytime i go to the zoo, i break down in front of the bird exhibits & shout HOW DID THEY CATCH YOU. U CAN FLY. HOW DID U LET THEM CATCH YOU"

"I probably should've said, ""Congrats on your 4th child!"" instead of ""Halfway there, OctoMom""."

"A donkey walked 12 miles.. but when measured the front leg walked 12 miles but the back legs walked only 10 miles Its because he was walking in a circle"

"I recently found out that I'm colorblind... It came out of the purple."