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Joke of the Day

"Saw this quote behind a auto rickshaw I couldn't afford a Volkswagen. Thus, auto."

"Alright, time for a Twitter spelling bee! First word: ""their"", meaning ""belongs to them."" Alright, that only leaves 14 of you left standing."

"I refuse to be an organ donor. Mainly because I'd like to be a fully-functional zombie if I rise for the apocalypse."

"If everyone would stop screaming, I'm sure we'd all agree I'm not supposed to be in this women's restroom."

"What weapon is most feared by knights? A can opener."

"How many stoners does it take to, ah... unhhhh.........."

"How does the Terminator lose weight? By counting Kylereese."

"An officer pulled me over for driving erratically, but it was because some bees had gotten into my car. He must have thought I was buzzed."

"Have you heard the story when the idiot said no?"

"What's the difference between a dentist and a sadist? Newer magazines."