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Joke of the Day

"If Sesame Street really cared about children they'd realize Big Bird could feed a hungry family for a month."

"The Religious Right. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups."

"Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls"

"Did you know you can see through Caitlyn Jenner? She is trans-parent."

"Why did Ellen Pao fire an employee with cancer? Fixed* [deleted]"

"OSTRICH: *buries head in sand* ANTELOPE: You're crazy! OSTRICH: Shut your mouth and help me bury the rest of him. I'm NOT going back to jail"

"What do you call an alligator in a vest? an investigator. :D"

"A tank and a snake are having a heated argument when the snake says ""Shut up! You got penis on your face!"" to which the tank replies ""You got face on your penis!"""

"So I slept right through the blood moon event this morning, I'm more of a crip moon guy anyway."

"[1st date] HER: I love the idea of marriage. What are your thoughts on it? ME: [trying to impress her] I have 6 wives"