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Joke of the Day
"I hate people who... I hate people who use big words just to make themselves look perspicacious."
Next Joke
"Why don't Jewish cannibals like eating Germans? They give them gas."
"While other countries are doubling down on education, we're using chicken breasts as sandwich bread."
"How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? ..To get to the other side!"
"Pancake day has really crepe'd up on me this year."
"As a kid I was frightened of the dentist... Because he was a Paedophile every time I went in he'd give me a filling"
"What goes up a chimney down, but won't go down a chimney up? An umbrella!"
"Falling vending machines kill more people per year than sharks. I've never even seen a shark near a vending machine."
"I still keep my old Blackberry on me in case I get mugged and the person's like ""HAND ME YOUR PHONE!"""
"I will totally judge you based on your choice of breakfast cereal, you unfrosted weirdo."