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Joke of the Day
"What's Paul Walker's favorite energy drink??? N.O.S. too bad he can't handle the crash..."
Next Joke
"When you have this song stuck in your head, is it just your mind playing tracks on you?"
"Dumb one-liner of the day: I imagine veterinarians who treat ducks put up with a lot of undeserved grief."
"I need to burn 644,098 calories at the gym today."
"Why, yes, I am dressed for the weather. I am wearing a house."
"There are actually only two stages of parenthood: having children, and having children who can reach things on countertops."
"Where can you always find kids by themselves? edit: i forgot to say please."
"What famous chiropodist ruled England ? William the Corn-cutter!"
"What do you call a priest giving a long, boring sermon? An anes-theologist. (close enough)"
"TIFU by picking up a dead bee. It wasn't. Now my thumb hurts."