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Joke of the Day
"I'd consider myself an artistic fetishist I go hard in the paint."
Next Joke
"[Reality TV] HOST: Welcome to America's Next Top Psychic! Please, try not to-- *One contestant stands up*: I WON! H: --ruin it."
"What do you call an italian hooker (with part 2) A pastatute Where does a pastatute live? The spaghetto"
"Why are there no Walmarts in Iraq? Because they are all Targets."
"Poland started World War 2 like Iraq was responsible for 9/11"
"What did one ghost say to the other? Do you believe in people?"
"My dad was showing me pictures of why to wear condoms during sex. The funny thing is, they were all pictures of me."
"Vacuumed a section of carpet 20 times before I realized I was trying to clean up a patch of sunshine. Intellectual powerhouse. Right here."
"You can't run in a campground, you can only ran because it's past tense."
"Q: What did the green grape say to the purple grape? A: Breathe, idiot! BREATHE!"