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Joke of the Day

"I've been researching some useless facts... Want some examples? I have found out that there are over 10,000 different types of lice. And that's just off the top of my head."

"Canada's navy"

"What type of belly buttons do cars have? Audi's."

"What's the expiry date on plastic? [81](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/UYwYdFdoecA/0.jpg)"

"If I could make puppies and kittens magically appear, people would call me ""The Wizard of Awwws""."

"I would never get a minivan because I can't even think of 7 people I'd want to be stuck in a vehicle with."

"Where does a salmon go to deposit a check? To the river bank!"

"Nitrogen Monoxide Having Nitrogen Monoxide as parents would really suck. Every time you ask them for something, they'd just be like, ""NO""."

"I swear if my memory gets any worse, I'll be able to plan my own surprise party."

"if you have a favorite tetris block that isn't the 4x1 long piece, you're a fucking contrarian idiot asshole and i hate you"