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Joke of the Day

"What do maggots and Alabama fans have in common? They can both live off a dead bear for years."

"Trump isn't wrong when he uses ""alternative facts""... He's just alt-right."

"[couples therapy] HER: His obsession with Star Wars is tearing us apart ME: *covering my Yoda doll's ears* Hear you he can, Karen"

"The guy at the grocery store just asked if I brought my reusable bag with me and I told him its none of his business where my girlfriend is"

"Instagram is experiencing difficulties. Until further notice, please cease visually chronicling the tedious mundanities of your life."

"What did the Vagina say to the Anus? I'll meet you at the Taint."

"I took the batterys out of my carbon monoxide detector. It was beeping the whole week, and my roof told me to."

"Knock Knock! -Who is it? -Santa -Oh, come on in santa. What did you bring me this year!? -Your black friday debts bitch! I'm Santa nder!"

"They tried to combine a networked hard drive with a device that brewed drinks... It was NAS-tea"

"What is Justin Timberlake's favourite Ukrainian river? The Crimea River."