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Joke of the Day

"I took the batterys out of my carbon monoxide detector. It was beeping the whole week, and my roof told me to."

Next Joke
 
"A guy walks into a bar ... and orders a drink."
"if Trump played classical pianoa Would he grab it by Debussy?"
"What do you call a smelly fellow that makes bad jokes? Pungent"
"What position does the pig play in football? Loinback."
"What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers."
"What's the difference between a physicist and an engineer A physicist says ""E = mc^2"", an engineer asks ""How much mass we talkin?"""
"Why shouldn't you buy trousers from northern Ukraine? Chernobyl fallout"
"Is the Capitol of Kansas pronounced ""Wichitay"" or ""Wichitah?"" It's pronounced ""Topeka."""
"The ""Personal life"" section of my Wikipedia article is actually pretty accurate. It's non-existent."