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Joke of the Day
"This one's for all you self-actualized people out there. You know who you are."
Next Joke
"Definition of anxiety: half of the time you're worried about the other half of the time."
"Why was 4 afraid of 5? Because 5 was a Registered Six Offender. Edit: a word."
"Why do I have to answer security questions to pay my bills? Ohmygod please tell me there are hackers out there trying to pay my bills...."
"Unlike most English people my girlfriend doesn't have bad teeth. She sold them."
"What did the Maple syrup farmer say when he saw a good looking maple tree? ""I'd tap that."""
"BREAKING: John Terry spotted changing into his full German kit."
"What do Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson have in common? They both spent a fortune making their noses more white."
"I was seeing a girl once ...until my binoculars broke"
"New Bike Shop A registered sex offender just moved into my neighborhood. He opened up a bicycle shop called Pedal-Feelya."