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Joke of the Day

"What driver doesn't have a license? A screw driver."

"So i worked at the USPS...I'm apparently not the ""man"" for the..... the sub its named for."

"How does Rudy Giuliani count to 10? He doesn't; he skips 1-8 and says 9-11 ten times."

"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr.Dre."

"What does a man with a tiny penis have for breakfast? Well this morning I had a PopTart, 2 eggs and a glass of orange juice."

"""IT'S A BOY"" I shouted... With tears rolling down my face, I shouted out loud. ""I DON'T BELIEVE IT. A BOY!"" It was at that moment I decided never to visit Thailand again."

"Did you hear about the pissed-off cartographer tasked with redrawing the map of Canada's largest territory? He was halving Nunavut."

"""this is your captain speaking. i bet you're reading this in a man's voice. well guess what! i'm a woman captain. women are captains too."""

"I know you look at the toilet paper after you wipe."

"Why is it hard to work at an apple pie factory? They have such a high turnover rate."